You can catch feelings for as long as you so wish, but this is the stark reality about giving. This is how life is cracked up to be:
1. Do not expect people you find privilege to help or develop to share a commensurate amount of enthusiasm to help others, especially you
2. Those you help, fix might not necessarily be in a position to fix others, especially you. However, there is someone somewhere who will be inspired to help you – and they must not know you
3. Do not spend time tallying how much you have helped others. It is a sacrosanct honour that you must never defile with your desire for reciprocity
4. In the shower, on traffic in your sleep, like everyone else, there is that one person who crosses your mind, the one who helped you when you sure needed help. Listen, if you like payment or are obsessed with getting even – then that is your payment
5. There are those created to help others. The ones who buy more booze at the club, the one in the relationship that cares more, the one in the sorority that everyone comes crying to once the pleasures are done, the one in the family that the bills eventually fall on etc. Sorry if you are that kind. Don’t kill yourself waiting for appreciation, yours is a lifetime of giving and your payment might just be the multitudes that show up at your funeral, or in heaven if you so believe in God
6. Delight in the smile that you put on that face, or the tear that you help wipe, or the hope that you help keep alive (never mind how genuine).
That my friend is counsel for free. That is the nakedness of the truth about giving. As Jamnazi sang, ‘tenda wema; nenda zako’. Have a nice lunch, usingojee mateke ya punde!